Last night Kim and I went to the show Velvet at the Sydney Opera House.

It was a combination of circus, burlesque and boogie nights (70's music) in one show.




The show had great music with Marcia Hines and Brendan Maclean and the performers were great. I think everyones favourite was the guy with the hula hoops.

I don't know for sure which ones are Claus and which ones are Rene.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

Kim gave me tickets for a performance called Bale de Rua (Brasilian street dance). This satisfied the criteria of experiences rather than objects as presents.




The performance took place in the opera house and it was really good. There was some really cool tricks.

I am still wondering why the dance crew consisted of 15 men and one woman...the woman didn't do anything that required her being a woman so it was a bit odd and could just as well have been a performance consisting of 16 men.

Kim had bought really good seats on the 4th row (almost too close) so we could see every drop of sweat.

While my dad was here we were looking after Kims nephews and niece a fair bit.

They loved coming over here to talk to my dad and play.

When they are here we put them to good use:

Here's is Kayla baking scones for us



And here she is sweeping the floor.



And here she is haging up the laundry.



Unfortunately I didn't get a photo from yesterday when she was watering the lawn for me.

While my dad was in Sydney we went to a number of different restaurants. We tried to find venues of the sort he hadn't tried before or that is unusual for his side of the hemisphere.

There was the Yum-Cha (For those that are not familiar with this...it is a sort of chinese dumpling place where you just point at the items you want from trolleys). And my dad was brave enough to try the chicken feet this time.





We also did Japanese a couple of times (once at Liverpool St which was terrible) and then later at Wagaya at the entertainment centre (which was excellent).




We also did brasilian (no, we did not all get a close shave). This was a lot of meat and we were all very full afterwards.




We also did French food at Tabou in Surrey Hills.



And one evening we did hot-pot at home with friends.



And Kims dad cooked his famous crabs.

New years eve we celebrated first with Kims family in Coogee. Here they had a firework at 9.30pm which was rather small.

Since my dad is in Sydney we though that he should have a look at the proper midnight firework, so after Coogee my dad and I drove into the city to watch the firework at Sydney Harbour.

Kim stayed back with her family because we expected to walk a fair bit to get into the city and especially to get back afterwards (and it would be hard to walk with her being pregnant).

I brought my camera gear and this is some of the shots I took (I haven't had time to photoshop anything).

Every year the local area puts on some amazing christmas decoration lightshows outside their houses.

One evening we went for a drive to take some photos...and here they are:

One day when it was raining and we were unable to do any work outside, we took my dad to the Blue Mountains.

It was nice and warm up there considering that the weather was sort of drizzling. My dad wanted to go and have another look at the Three Sisters, but they were covered in clouds, so instead we came up with taking the scenic railway as an alternative into the Jamison Valley.

As soon as Kim saw the drop into the valley she immediately bailed out and said that she didn't want to go....too steep.

My dad and I continued into the valley and went for a walk along one of the tracks there. While there I did some close-up photos of some of the local fauna.




After the walk we headed back up to the top with the cable car and then to Katooma for some lunch.



After lunch it was clearing up a bit, but the sisters were still covered. Instead we went for a walk at Wentworth Falls. My dad had never been there so that was something new for him.





After the walk it was getting late and we headed back to Sydney.

Every year on Boxing day (26th December) the Sydney to Hobart Yacht race kicks off.

It is a great event for anyone interested in sailing to see the large boats exit out through the heads of Sydney Harbour.




My dad was interested in seeing the race start and I wanted to get some great photos with the ships and the north head in the background.

We arrived at Watsons bay about 30 minutes before the race start and only just made it up to the viewpoint as the boats went through the heads. We were running the last 500 meters so as not to miss it (it has been a while since I've seen my dad run that sort of distance).



It was spectacular to watch all the ships and the follow boats head out through the harbour and head south towards the Tasman sea.



On the way back to the car we walked past the nude beach full of perverts (I don't mind nudists...but when it is old men with hard-on's standing facing the public swinging their willy's back and forth or pouring beer on it then they are exhibitionist perverts....click here...and....here...so see what I mean).

The winner of the race this year finished after 2 days and 9 hours.

In the morning of Christmas Day we were so stuffed that we weren’t ready to start eating again already.



Kim’s family always puts on a big feats on Christmas Day with turkey, ham, seafood and a lot of other Asian and non Asian dishes.



The food was great and amazingly Santa Claus appeared again (He must have been hovering around in the area).

This may also come as a surprise to you....but Santa Clause does exist and he visited our house on Christmas Eve.



We did the traditional Christmas dinner with friends coming over along with some of our nieces and nephews. Soeren and Nui joined us with their daughter and Andy joined us with his daughter so it was an almost equal representation of adults and kids (if you count me as a kid).



Later on in the evening Santa Clause appeared (Ethan asked where the reindeer were and apparently they were parked on the roof).

Ethan had been asking all evening whether Santa would be coming. Eventually we told him that Santa is a very busy man and that he visits all the good kids first and leaves all the naughty ones until later...that kept him quiet for a while.



He gave the children lots of presents and soon afterwards he headed off again...he is a very busy person this time of the year (I think he borrowed a couple of beer from the fridge).



By the end of the evening we were so stuffed with food that we had to be rolled into bed.

My dad arrived early January to spend Christmas and New Years Eve here with us.

Before he arrived i asked him if he'd mind helping with a couple of jobs arround the house. I told him that the biggest job was the tiles in the outdoor area in the back yard.

When they built the house they only tiled a part of the area. Later they extended the area but didn't level the area properly so where the joint between the old and the new area was the tiles weren't the same level and were either loose or broken. My dad thought it was best if we removed all the tiles on the upper deck and then poured a new concrete slab on top of the old one. He said that this would guarantee that the area would have the correct run-off from the house and at the same time avoid any spots where water would collect (There is two small areas where the water collects with the result that dirt and leaves collect and makes a mess).



So far we have removed all the old tiles (360 tiles in total equalling more than 1 ton worth) and carried these to the front of the house. We also carried 1.3 ton of cement to the back to pour the slab (65 bags of cement). My dad was poiring most of this and leveling it while I was at work before Christmas. On top of this is all the new tiles, adhesive and grout (all heavy lifting).


I notices after a days rain that water was collecting in a couple of areas and my dad told me that I shouldn't worry about it as he would be able to compensate for this when laying the tiles to ensure that the water would run off.


The slab is now complete and we are ready to start laying new tiles. We bought a jackhammer which has been a life saver in terms of removing the old tiles and mixing the new cement and adhesive.

The area won't look too much different from before though. We are laying the exact same type of tiles (otherwise it wouldn't match the rest of the area at the back of the house and at the front).

I just really hope my dad does a good job making sure everything is level, because otherwise this would be a waste of the $3000 it is costing in materials and tools (I can also see that I will have a cleanup job to do afterwards...there is cement on the walls and the fence of the house how...my dads comment was that he couldn't take that much care and that I'd just have to re-paint the house). If water is still collecting then we could have accomplished the same for a fraction of the price (and work) by just replacing and leveling a couple of rows of tiles at the area where they were broken (admittedly this would have been uneven, but the savings would probably have justified it).


Problem is that I won't know how dodgy the job is until after we've finished the grouting which wouldn't happen until end of this week (with a lot of effort).

Anyway...will provide an update when we finish.

Christmas is approaching fast. The Christmas tree is up and Kim is busy shopping for presents for the various people.

The other night I managed to slot in 10 minutes for the first set of Christmas photos of Aiden and Lucas.




I was shooting these with a 50mm f1.4 lens to get the nice blurry Christmas tree lights. This also meant that I didn't have much room to play with when it came to focus...almost impossible with two moving kids whily trying to get the right mood with facial expressions, tantrums etc. Aiden couldn't sit still and Lucas refused to wear his hat. What do they say...never photograph wild animals and children!

The other day it was Aiden and Lucas Christmas concert with their daycare centre.

This year they were supposed to dress up in some country's national clothes.

We borrowed some Chinese clothes from KC and they looked very cute in it.






The concert went very well. We were especially impressed how well Aiden was able to follow the instructions and the moves to the various dances.








It was especially funny when they were singing this song with Konitchiwa...Namaste....BULA!!!!




Lucas was also in the first part of the concert sitting down the front with one of the carers.

Aiden is still playing soccer once a week. Last week he insisted on wearing my shoes instead of his own.



Maybe he was hinting that his old shoes are getting too small.

We have had a lot of rain lately. On one of the days I was showing Aiden and Lucas how to make a pair of funny glasses out of an egg crate and a piece of string.

They got to paint the glasses afterwards.

The other day I picked up Aiden and Lucas pretty late from daycare.

They were in the process of cleaning and Aiden was eagerly waiting for them to turn on the vacuum cleaner so he could play with it.

I have already gone out too far. I cannot return and jump over the stream because it is growing inside of me and is becoming a roaring river.
What are these strange thoughts I am having?
Were these free farmers in the hills above Varde Aaa more free at year 900 than they were in year 1100?
The only difference was christianity.

Off to the library
The landowner at Noerholm
The Herredfoged.
The Bishop in Ribe
It is all written here

I start thinking about hunting
A good hunter makes sure that they keep a healthy game on the property. He will feed the game during tough winters and make sure that the the overall health is there and have to most productive game survive.
No, it is not right to have these thoughts here in the library when it is the farmers I need to find information on.

Queen Margaret..
Make a claim on Noerholm..
Maybe there is something here..

Wasn't it the landowner of Noerholm that owned Noerholm?
Has he just built up Noerholm and then put his filthy hand on every surrounding piece of land and property?
Which the church was claiming that it should own?
Or was it the Bishop in Ribe?

This was not what I was supposed to find here at the library. It was the farmer - farmers!

Hunting...

What rubbish was that. I must get rid of these thoughts, this has nothing to do with hunting.

It wouldn't have been the lord who was out there beginning to move large boulders.

And not the bishop -

Christianity had just been introduced but building that many churches required a lot of workforce.

My thoughts are diverted.

Has this big change in faith based activity created communities, something in common because surely it was the farmers who built the churches.
This introduction was it something that made the existence easier for the farmers, my old roots.
It must have been, a lot of other things to believe in has been forgotten and the church is now a gathering place.

You should never start researching your ancestry.
You encounter one surprise after another and will never finish. There is always more.
There is changes in ones beliefs for every new discovery.

Of cause it was the farmers who built the churches. Who else would have?
They probably started with the words; "On the day of honour I am with you".

My thoughts are again left astray.

Russia build the aswan dam in Egypt.

Yes, I saw it myself with my own eyes. I drove in my car along the large canals they were digging.

How was it that they explained it to me?
This canal was to be dug 5 metres deep, 100 metres wide and should extend 800km out into the desert.

There were thousands of workers, it all looked like a large ants nests.
Men with baskets full of soil on their heads.

There was not a single Russian in this ants nest.

- Who actually built the Aswan Dam? -

Farmers

My grandads memoirs.

-

My Memoirs.

-

But there has to be something before us.

Our family of farmers from Kongeaaen at Toboel to Lyngbakkerne across Varde Aa - Mejls - Hornelund - Sig.

How did they live in the last 1000 years?

I rush to the library but it feels like hitting a miss in the lottery.

Have my ancestors, the farmers, not accomplished anything that made it worthy for a couple of pages in the danish history?

Yes, they have of cause not walked about killing each other to get hold of their neighbors possessions. Rather the opposite, from the looks of it, it was the farmers that were killed.

And for this the killers deserved a rather prominent mentioning in the history.

Yes, there was built a number of churches in the 1100's, but my relatives, the farmers are not mentioned.

I start to think.

- Who actually built these churches? -.

..as a couple of cows and a bull out on the feeding grounds. Something that can work and reproduce.

There is an old say like this - The devil looks after his own.
Let me immediately point out that the Devil didn't look after the farmers in the area around Varde and it was obvious that it was the met in power that were looked after by the Devil.

Here I would like to jump forward to 1300-1400 in the Danish history (Queen Margaret I). It is like my ancestors roots here start sprouting quickly. It is not quite clear who owns then, the church or the landowner at Noerholm.
Queen Margaret interfere in the argument and this gives the farmers a bit of breathing space.
A few farmers become more established and become independent (owns their land).
How should all these farmers see all the trouble ahead? Yes, even the Danish history has forgotten them.
It is only all the bad evil, power hungry people that are written about.
The more bloodthirsty the more pages they get in the book.

How mush is described about the farmers fight for independence against Kristian the 3rd?

The farmers at Varde invaded the river fortres at Varde and destroyed it but then had to retreat north with Captain Clement pursued by Johan Rantzau the kings right hand.
The farmers were at last defeated at Aalborg so that they would not appear in the history books. Not even crying and mourning by women and children behinds the hills at Varde river.

Honour becomes he who should be honoured.

I am stuck.

There is something peculiar about this study.

Why do I still return to - in a time of hunting?

Right! I remember, there is a book by that name.

I tell myself to think about something else - And he thoughts saw wide views.
And the neighbours wife said to her mum - That decease looks just like...

No, this is enough...

Were the farmers the hunted game or not?
Were the king, the lords, the church, the bishop the hunters?

Were the farmers the game and the hunting so good that the hunters couldn't agree on splitting the game?
Was it like that all over Denmark? Of cause it was. the Varde area was no exception.

It is something strange you are getting involved in when you study your ancestors.
The farmers had to live, otherwise there was nothing to hunt, but when the land owner was about to loose his hunting rights then the hunting escalated to the point where the game was about to go extinct.
The hunters would then loose interest and start hunting elsewhere.

Here we can mention the war against Sweden with its following plague as well as Napoleon with his Spanish troops in Denmark.

The farmers always recovered, because they were the lifeline for Denmark.
Children are born and new generations grow up between the marshes and hills without knowing whether they in years to come will be valuable as game and hence again be hunted to extinction.

It is the owners of the hunting grounds, their mentality and actions that is written into the Danish history. They have been lifted onto the podium for their dishonest behaviour.

On the contrary is just mentioned as an afterthought...

This Sunday it was fathers day.

It was celebrated with a game of Bowling with the kids in the morning and then family dinner in the evening (with yummi chocolate cake).







This photo is the only family photo I have with the entire Kims family (including little Mia).

This weekend Kim and I joined a couple of friends at the opera house to see the show Anything Goes.

This is a great musical which I believe is based on a book and it was first shown on Broadway all the way back in 1934.

I love the old costumes from back...

Lucas doesn't like me taking photos of him.

Here I caught him having a moment after I picked him up at daycare.

I realised that I hadn't posted anything from Aidens birthday.

On the weekend we had a bowling birthday party with all the kids (and mum and dad) dressed up as super heroes.

















We also had a family dinner where we celebrated both his, Kayla's and Adams (his cousins) birthdays.

Although we have had a beautiful winter with lots of sunny days and mild daytime temperatures, we have also had some cold mornings.



One morning the car had frost on it and it was only 5 degrees outside (most winter mornings it is 8-10 degrees with 18-22 degree daytime temps).

Last weekend Aiden graduated in his swim class from being a Crab to being a turtle.



He's been in the swim class for a couple of years now and never graduated. He would swim fine with me, but would cry and be scared with the swim teacher.

After our trip to Thailand in June he gained a lot of confidence and was very happy to swim by himself, but the swim teacher was too careful so he was unable to show what a good swimmer he really is. So, last weekend I asked the swim teacher to let him swim with the result that she by the end of the lesson graduated him and moved him to the next class.

He was so proud (and so was his dad).

This Sunday we took the boys to Thirlmere trainworks. This is a large train museum with lots of old steam trains.

Here we learned that steam trains in NSW were running up until 1973 which means that we were born in the era of steam trains...makes me feel really old.



We went for a ride on one of the old steam trains (I think I was more excited than the kids).
























As usual Aiden and Lucas were monkeying around being best mates. This is a bus on rails.






This is an instruction carriage used to teach how to operate the brakes on a steam train.

In the spirit of trying to keep the boys active Kim and I took them of a coastal walk from Coogee to Clovelly on a beautiful winters day.



The water in the little bays were calm and clear.






Half way we sat down and had a snack.



Kim braved it with the aerial yoga.



And the boys were being themselves...best mates.






















They loved being outside and they managed to walk the whole way (bribed by ice cream) even though Lucas on the last stretch was asking to be picked up.

On the day we were flying out it was Kims birthday.

I had arranged a cake for her in the morning ordered through one of the local cafes a couple of days earlier.





The hotel provided a fairly average cream and jam pile that no one ate.

To celebrate Kims birthday she organised for the family to go and see a show called Siam Niramit.

This show was about a 45 minutes drive from the hotel but transport was as usual included (as it is in pretty much all activities you organise).





Unfortunately Kims dad couldn't join us as he had been severely dehydrated from not drinking enough water and wearing too many clothes in the heat.

We were greeted at the show by actors in their beautiful costumes.









We then proceeded into the venue where we had a large buffet style dinner. KC organised for the staff to come and sign birthday song for Kim.







After dinner there were some pre-show activities such as kick boxing, tug of war with elephants as well as an elephant parade. More actors were dressed in their costumes.

































After this was the show. The staging and props were absolutely amazing. Everything was big, and very well made. They even had a small river flowing through the stage in which actors rowed their canoos and swam in. They also had a massive monsoon rainfall in one of the acts.

The various acts despicted important historical chapters of the Thai history and mythology.

The had fabled creatures and real elephants, water buffaloes as part of the acting. Actors went flying across the stage with more that 100 actors as part of the show.

Below are some of the photos I could find to 'borrow' as I didn't take any photos during the show itself (not allowed).